Sunday, July 27, 2014

Just Checking In

Yeah, I've been neglecting this bad boy lately, but I don't feel too bad about it.  It was mostly meant as an exercise to keep me writing a bit and I've been writing some more short stories lately so it's not like I NEED to do this.  That said, I don't want to abandon it entirely, so I'm just popping in and having a look around.  Boy, what a shithole.  Someone needs to clean this place up, for crying out loud.

Oh, and just as an amusing anecdote I saw a truck drive by the other day for a company called Rogers Water.  I'm guessing they get their water from the Dark Side of the Well.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Weird Happenings During the Eclipse

So remember that lunar eclipse I was talking about?  I went out in my backyard and saw it and it was totally cool.  But as I was looking up, as one is wont to do during an eclipse, some strange object I can only describe as sort of a white squiggly line went flying slowly overhead.  At first I tried to come up with a mundane explanation.  My initial thought was it was a piece of litter that had gotten blown way up in the air somehow.  There wasn't any breeze at all down on the ground but I understand it can be different up in the sky.  But it would have to have been a really big piece of litter.  The next thought was maybe it was some kind of solitary extremely skinny and wispy cloud.  But there weren't any other clouds in the sky and it moved in a strange way almost like it was alive.  Then I was thinking some sort of bird or bat or something, but it would have been a freaking gigantic specimen.  Maybe some sort of weird creature that only emerges during the "Blood Moon"?  I pointed it out to my girlfriend and she saw it too.  She described it as sort of a ripple in space.  Was it a traveling portal to another dimension?  Hell, was it aliens?  A top secret government experimental aircraft?  All I know is it was flying, I couldn't identify what it was, and it was some sort of an object.  So technically I can say I saw a U.F.O. during the eclipse.

Monday, April 14, 2014

Eclipses and Overused Time Travel Plots

So there's supposed to be total lunar eclipse tonight, which is pretty cool.  I'm looking forward to checking that shit out.  It's kind of crazy how they know in advance when eclipses are going to happen.  That got me thinking about how there's all kinds of stories where people travel back in time and then they amaze the natives by pretending to black out the sun or moon because they know there's going to be an eclipse.  That was a pretty cool idea the first time someone thought of it because such a display surely would convince a bunch of primitive folk that you're some sort of god.  But it's been done so many times it's starting to stretch credibility.  Don't get me wrong, I'm willing to fully accept the time travel component of the story, but the fact that so many time travelers happen to travel back to dates that had eclipses, let alone the fact that they knew there would be an eclipse on that date in the distant past.  I mean I sure don't keep track of when eclipses are.  The only reason I know there's one tonight is because the internet told me.  I've seen a few other eclipses in the past, but I couldn't tell you now what dates they were.

I guess it's possible the time traveler could have researched dates of eclipses and intentionally chosen to travel to one of them, but then there's the part where they have to time it so precisely that they can "make" the eclipse happen right when they're being threatened by the natives.  What happens if there aren't any natives around when the eclipse happens?  Maybe you don't encounter any until the eclipse is already over.  Or maybe the natives already killed you because the eclipse is still an hour away.

All I'm saying is nobody needs to use this plot in a story anymore.  Besides they'll probably think you have magic powers anyway if you just bring a BIC lighter with you.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Tangents

I think it's kind of fun sometimes to just go off on tangents.

The word tangents kind of sounds like tangerines, which are a kind of interesting fruit.  They're kind of like oranges, but their not.

Speaking of oranges I think I read somewhere that they didn't actually exist in nature until humans artificially created them by merging them with some other fruit.  I could be thinking about something else though.

The whole idea of artificiality is kind of strange to me.  Since humans are part of nature isn't everything we create, in a sense, natural?  It's like when you read a list of ingredients and they say artificial flavors or colors. Where exactly are these flavors and colors coming from?  Yeah, I know it's a lab, but they still must on some level be created from natural things.

Speaking of labs, how do you suppose mad scientists get a hold of their labs?  Are those things just for sale and you can go out and buy one so you can build a monster?

When you're young you learn that monsters aren't real, but if you were being attacked by a snarling grizzly bear with its fangs dripping and its claws extended, I think you'd believe in monsters.  Same with sharks.  If they're not sea monsters, I don't know what is.  Monsters are real.

Speaking of real I think it's kind of crazy how in math there are real numbers and imaginary numbers.  In a sense imaginary numbers are real, too, because mathematicians really use them.

You know what else mathematicians use sometimes?  Tangents.

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Damn Entropy

So it's like a law of the universe that entropy always increases.  Left to their own devices things will fall into disorder and chaos rather than line up in an orderly fashion.  It takes energy to place things into order and then once left alone they will descend into disorder of their own accord.  I can see this in action all the time in my little computer room.  Every so often I get a bug up my ass to clean it.  It takes awhile and it takes effort that is much less enjoyable than sitting around and not cleaning up.  And for a short while the room looks pretty good.  But then I don't do anything and after just a little bit of time it turns to crap again.  Why does the universe have to be set up in annoying ways that make you have to do unpleasant work?  I'm lazy, damn it.  I need a universal law that slowly tidies things up while I kick back.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

The Evolutionary Advantage of Being a Jerk

There's an old saying about nice guys always finish last.  That unfortunately seems to be all too true.  You don't apparently do yourself any favors in life by being a good person.  But why is that?  I hate jerks.  Most people seem to hate jerks.  So why do we allow them to get ahead so often?

There's this game I remember playing in a college class called prisoner's dilemma.  The gist of it is you can either cooperate with your opponent/partner or you can screw them over.  If you both cooperate you both get a point.  If one guy cooperates but the other one opts for the screw over the screwer gets two points while the screwee gets no points.  If you both choose to screw each other over then nobody gets any points.  The point of this game, from what I can tell, is that there is a short-term advantage to screwing over people.  But in the long run if we were all cool and cooperated we would all benefit.  If we're all jerks and screw each other over we all end up screwed.

The problem is jerks have found their evolutionary niche.  There are enough cool nice people out there that are evolved enough to realize the benefit of cooperation in life, but because of that we are easily preyed upon by the jerks of life.

But if we choose to react by being jerks ourselves then nobody wins.  The only possible way for everyone to win is for everyone to be cool, but sadly history has proven that will never happen.  So to succeed it seems you have to be a jerk and hope that not everyone else will be.  I'm sorry, but that's messed up.  Welcome to our world, by the way.

Friday, January 31, 2014

Insignificance Everywhere

  Sometimes it's frustrating and depressing to realize what a small, insignificant cog you really are.  I mean, not just in the grand scheme of the universe.  I'm okay with that, I think.  The universe is gigantic and we're like bacteria inhabiting a microscopic dust particle.  That actually makes me feel better to think about sometimes, because it makes me realize that all this bullshit we get worked up about all the time is completely meaningless.

  But on a smaller scale, as far as human society goes, it hits you in the face once in awhile how little of an impact you have on what's going on.  There really are just a small handful of movers and shakers that control the media and the money and everything and they don't really want to let you into it.  Instead they want to distract you with dancing pretty boys with frosted-tipped hair and ignorant morons ranting.

The internet is supposed to be a great equalizer where you can affect the entire world just sitting in your home, but really since everyone's on it it's really hard not to just get drowned in all the noise.  In the meantime we've elevated the likes of Miley Cyrus and Kanye West to the top of the pile.  That's just depressing, and I know I'm contributing it to it in my microscopic way by mentioning them.  But if we're going to continue on ignoring the voices of "common" people, at the very least can we get some better celebrities?  I'm ashamed of the human race.  I really am.

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Dogs and Their Weird Sense of Smell

Whenever I come home and kick off my shoes, one of my dogs immediately likes to run up and stick his nose deep into them and rub his face around for awhile.  You know, really get the foot funk deep into his nostrils and spread all around his face.  Now dogs have way better senses of smell than us and yet they seem to like the smell of gross things.  They enjoy sniffing each other's butts, smelling the garbage and then subsequently eating out of it, or smelling any sort of poop or dead animal they encounter on walks and possibly subsequently trying to eat that as well.
  I get that smells contain information for them, but I would think as rank as that sort of stuff smells to us, the last thing I would want would be to smell it even better.  I'm guessing when you're able to smell that intensely there are no bad smells.  Everything smells amazing and wonderful.  I wish I could smell my stinky shoes through my dog's nose.  He looks like he's quite enjoying himself.  I would love to be able to obtain the level of pleasure my dog achieves by rubbing his face inside my shoes.

Monday, January 6, 2014

An Ode to Obscure, Underappreciated, and Misunderstood Artists

  I am a writer and a musician who has received no accolades or recognition of any kind.  Yet I continue on.  The reasons for this aren't always entirely clear.  It's frustrating sometimes.  I think it's basic human nature to want to be appreciated and validated.  We want others to recognize our brilliance.  But something occurred to me recently.  Wishing for the respect and admiration of others is actually a separate thing from needing to create.  The simple act of creation offers its own set of thrills and is ultimately what drives me to keep going whether I ever receive any recognition or not.
  Here's the thing:  Creating something is genuinely magical.  Where once there was absolutely nothing, now there is something.  Where does that something come from?  That is the divine mystery of creation.  I've often wondered in the past if all music or all stories exist somewhere out there in the cosmic ether and as artists we are somehow sensitive to receiving them.  People ask where you get your ideas and a lot of times it's not really clear.  A lot of the best stuff seems to just kind of flow on out of you.
  Any song, story, or piece of art you produce is, in essence, a gift from the universe to you.  When you sit down to write a story, for instance, you are asking the universe to give one to you, and if you're lucky, it does.  I'm not saying that it takes no work on your part.  You often have to ponder and sweat and piece things together and puzzle over them.  There's always tedious perfecting and correcting and tightening up and filling in the gaps.  But nothing beats that thrill of some new song or story or whatever being brought into existence.  And you're there to witness it's birth.
  That's the whole "creativity is its own reward" thing.  All the recognition and acclaim and all that rigamarole you may hope for is really its own different thing and would come much later, if it comes at all.  And really you're kind of just looking for an ego boost.  But if you change your perspective just slightly that aspect seems kind of silly.  If all songs, stories, and art already exist and we are merely transmitting them from the ether to this world, then ego doesn't enter into it and really we are seeking to be praised for being good transmitters.  You may as well praise a radio for doing a good job at transmitting its signal.
  There's one more thing that's kind of cool about being obscure.  You're actually special in your obscurity.  Lots of super successful artists actually lose ownership of their own creations, and not just in a legal sense.  The songs of the Beatles don't really belong to the Beatles so much as they belong to the world.  When you're obscure those songs or stories or whatever belong to you and only you.  I might not be a "successful" musician, but I know I've heard a whole lot of music that nobody else has, and that's actually pretty cool, when you think about it.